Thirteen

This is a letter to my daughter,

I can’t believe that you are a teenager! Although I do see some major eye rolling and a lot more time away from the “mommy” you used to be glued to, you’re still the beautiful, loveable you! You will always be our baby.

I want you to know that the day you were born was the most magical day of our lives. God blessed us with the most amazing little girl in the world. You are the most precious gift we have ever received.

You changed our lives forever. You are as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside. You are an old soul, wise beyond your years. You fill our hearts and our lives with so much love and purpose. I know that whatever you do in life will positively impact the world. Your beautiful heart is filled with love, kindness and compassion. The love and loyalty you have for your family members and your friends always amazes me. We are so privileged to have you as our daughter. While we help shape the person you will become as an adult you have helped us to grow and learn as well. I know you will teach us a lot more as you continue to grow into the beautiful woman you will soon become. Know that love and the bond you shared with your grandparents will sustain you for life. You will always have them watching over you. They were so proud of you just as we are. I know that you will continue to make us proud.

We love you Sophia and wish you the happiest of birthdays. Welcome to your teen years, they go fast, so learn, live well, make the right decisions and always know that your family will be here for you. Remember, God and family first, always, that’s the legacy that is left for you by your grandparents.

Love, Mommy

I love this manifesto on parenting by Brene Brown and thought that I would share it with you all.

If you want to download the parenting Manifesto..click on this link. Wholehearted_ParentingManifesto (5

And if you want to shop for some pretty gorgeous little girl clothes make sure to visit http://www.ariaandsophia.com

Essential Oils

Do you have a child that suffers from constant ear infections? Before it gets really bad try treating it holistically.
.I’ve been using essential oils to keep my family healthy for years. It has made a world of difference in our lives.


Here is what you do for children suffering with ear discomfort….

.INGREDIENTS

  • 1 drop Lavender
  • 1 drop Frankincense
  • 1 drop Tea Tree
  • 1 tablespoon carrier oil
  • Cotton Ball
DIRECTIONS
  1. In a small dish, combine the essential oils with the carrier oil. Saturate the cotton ball with the mixture.
  2. Rub essential oils around the ear and down the neck, them put the cotton ball right on the outside of your ear.
  3. Refresh the cotton ball every 30 minutes until the pain subsides and then every 4 hours for the next two days.

For Babies and Toddlers…

MASSAGE BLEND

  • 20 drops Tea Tree
  • 20 drops Thyme linalol
  • 20 drops Lavender
  • Carrier oil, warmed
  1. Combine tea tree, thyme, and lavender in a small stock bottle.
  2. To use, place a teaspoon of carrier in a small dish and add 4 drops of the blend.
  3. Massage around the ear, on the cheek, and down the neck.
  4. Follow with a warm compress.

For adults…

This blend can help to support a healthy immune response.

  • 10 drops oregano
  • 10 drops clove
  • 10 drops rosemary
  • 10 drops lemon
  • Carrier oil
  1. Place oregano, clove, rosemary and lemon in a 2 ounce stock bottle. Fill with carrier oil.
  2. Shake well to combine.
  3. Place 5 drops on the bottom of the feet ever 30 minutes until pain subsides.

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DISCLAIMER: While I do believe that natural remedies are a sage and effective way to deal with minor ear pain, it’s important that you seek medical attention should your ear ache persist. Use the holistic alternatives when you feel discomfort, if there is no improvement within a day and if the pain is acute, please seek medical attention.
These remedies have worked for my family but should not be taken as medical advice.

Bringing smiles to children of war

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I would like to tell you about my friend David Mason and his amazing plight to bring smiles to the faces of innocent children. He has dedicated his life to helping children of War.

Unfortunately, right now, while our kids are safe and thriving, there are millions of children around the world suffering. This is happening right now, in our lifetime. Those of us who are parents can imagine the horrors that these innocent children have face. Think of what they feel and how they are able to survive.

I met David in 2003, when I was on a trip to Afghanistan, my parents homeland. I had not been there since before the war, so I was vey young. My family was in the US, when Afghanistan was invaded by Russia. My father was a diplomat in the United Nations and so, the trip in 2003, was my first time back “home”.

It was an emotional trip. Before our plane even descended, the landscape of the country took my breath away and took me back in time. Seeing the majestic mountains ignited a rush of  bitter-sweet memories.

 

My cousin Wais introduced me to David, a Danish-Iranian, in his early 30’s who had left his comfortable life in Denmark to help the Afghan children. He was inspired after 9-11. He wanted to do something good, for the most innocent of us, for our children. According to David, my cousin kind of adopted him and his dream of what is now the Afghan Mobile Mini-Circus for Children (MMCC). 

 

David, is the founder, MMCC, an educational non-profit that uses circus activities to educate and empower kids. The program also manages to bring smiles to the faces of Afghanistan’s children and promote peace in the war-torn country.

At MMCC’s flagship school in Kabul, Afghanistan, 120 children ages ten to 17, learn juggling, unicycling, acrobatics, theater, singing, puppetry and magic tricks. They then perform and conduct workshops across the country, spreading awareness about health, land mines, the importance of education, and other issues along the way.

 Most of the circus activities are led by the kids themselves.

This wonderful human being continues to spread joy and awareness with the Afghan Mobile Mini-Circus for Children (MMCC) for all these years. 

 

Now they are looking to raise money to transform the harsh winter of 900 underprivileged Afghan Children into a cheerful one. By donating, you will help ensure that the children will be safe and secure from the cold and bitterness of winter, while learning English, Computer, various Artistic, physical, Social and Life Skills while having fun.

Please take some time to log onto their site and give what you can. 

46% of the funds for Cheerful Afghan Winter for 900 underprivileged is raised, Thanks and keep Donating and Sharing please: www.globalgiving.org/projects/Cheerful-Af

ghan-Winter

 

Essential Oils

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Photo by icon0.com on Pexels.com

For the past couple of years I have leaned to use essential oils as a way to keep the people I love stay healthy. At first, many family members, including my husband, were skeptical, but eventually they came around.  They saw the benefits of using essential oils first hand.

I was recently asked to share what I know about how to use essential oils, so from now on, I will be sharing what I know one essential oil at time every week. I’m not an expert, just a mom who has spent many hours researching the benefits of essential oils. I would love to help you learn from what I know.

More people, especially parents are turning to more natural & holistic approaches when it come to healthcare. By using natural remedies to heal ourselves we can be free of the worries of unwanted side effects.

My use of essential oils began over a decade ago when I got into meditation, to help my anxiety. The person guiding the class applied Lavender essential oil on our temples to help us relax.  Lavender has a wonderful smell and it really helped relax me. I used it every night before bed for a long time, I still do but now I tend to alternate oils, not just Lavender. I loved it so much I started to seriously look into essential oils more.

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Also, I grew up with an amazing, magical mother who always used natural remedies for us. She would have us gargle with salt water for a sore throat, massage sweet almond oil once a week into our scalp and hair to keep it healthy. She taught my sister and I how to use yogurt as a face mask, put cold cucumbers on our eyes to bring down any puffiness, toothpaste for our burns and a million other holistic remedies. She would even make ridiculous faces and claim she was exercising her facial muscles so she would not need a face lift. She was brilliant and beautiful with such class, strength and impeccable manners. She had a heart of gold and a smile for whomever crossed her path. She and I started writing a book together that included all her beauty and health remedies, but then my dad got sick and then he passed away and then she left this earth and left us.

Today is the first anniversary of her death, she has always been the wind beneath my wings, and she continues to be even in death. I know she would want me to be strong for my family. I’m doing just what my mother would want me to do, helping others like she always did. Thank you mom, I love you so much and will miss you all of my life. She was the first to want to learn and then use my essential oils. I hope to pay it forward and help you help yourself.

So the first thing you need to know is that you should always use pure essential oils, that way you avoid any pesticides. Do your research, I prefer to use Doterra, but there are some other companies that use pure essential oils as well. There are a few ways to use the oils, you can inhale them, diffuse them, use them topically and there are a few that you can actually ingest. It’s a lot to learn but if you take your time and do your research you will use them without even thinking.

When I use essential oils topically, I aways dilute it with some sort of carrier oil, such as fractionated coconut oil, a heat pressed refined oil. Using essential oils straight or neat is usually too abrasive and can sometimes harm you, even burn your skin.

This week’s essential oil is Peppermint oil. It’s one of the most versatile essential oils out there. It can  help with muscle aches, seasonal allergies, low energy and digestive problems. Its also used to boost energy and improve both skin and hair health.

The next time you have a headache, instead of taking a Tylenol or an aspirin,  use a teaspoon of a carrier oil with two or three drops of peppermint oil. Apply it to the back of your neck, to your temples and your forehead. I usually make a roller , most of it is filled with fractionated coconut oil, with a few drops of peppermint oil and I roll it to my temples and back of my neck. Be careful not to get any in your eyes. Wash your hands after handling any essential oils.

For fevers, you can rub it down the spine on the hairline and the neck. To help boost energy, rub peppermint with some lemon essential oil on the back of your neck,  you can also put a drop or two in your water.

To help relieve seasonal allergies symptoms, diffuse peppermint and eucalyptus oil at home, or apply 2–3 drops of peppermint oil topically to your temples, chest and back of neck.

To boost your energy levels and improve concentration with peppermint oil, take 1–2 drops internally with a glass of water, or apply topically to your temples and back of neck.

You can put a drop on your toothpaste to freshen your breath and kill bacteria. Add 2–3 drops of peppermint to your shampoo and conditioner. It’s actually used in many high-quality hair care products because it can naturally thicken and nourish damaged hair. It helps  stimulate the scalp.

There are so many other ailments that peppermint essential oil aids, here is a list of a few,

  • Relieves itchiness
  • Relieves sunburn
  • Reduces nausea
  • Repels bugs
  • promotes healthy skin

Let me know if you want to know about a particular oil and it’s benefits. Next week I’ll tell you all the benefits of Lemon essential oil.

Happy Holidays, enjoy the ones you love.

 

 

 

 

YOUR WORDS GIVE LIFE TO YOUR LIFE

“What we speak becomes the house we live in.” ~ Hafiz
“Words are things, I’m convinced. You must be careful about the words you use or the words you allow to be used in your house.” -Maya Angelou

Think about how profound that is, especially if you are a parent. 

Words bring out the best or the worst in us. You can uplift people or tear them down with words. You can empower or disempower both yourself and those you share words with. And that is why it is so important to pay close attention to our words.

Words are seeds that do more than blow around. They land in our hearts and not the ground. Be careful what you plant and careful what you say. You might have to eat what you planted one day.-unkown

We are all human and lose control of ourselves from time to time but for the little humans we are raising, it’s imperative that they hear words that encourage, uplift and even heal. So the next time you have something to say, speak with intention. It all goes back to being mindful.

“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present.” -Bill Keane

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There are mornings when I wake up and the reality that I have lost both of my parents hits me hard! My heart falls into my stomach, I feel sick and so lost. To be without them always feels like a punch in the gut. It still takes my breathe away. My father is gone a year and four months, my mother passed away almost a year ago. It’s a pain that I would never want for anyone to experience, yet we all will. Some morning  I feel completely paralyzed, unable to accept that they are both gone, until I hear my 12 year-old call out to me. Her voice helps me to  refocus and be grateful for her existence.

It’s not easy to deal with loss, especially when you suffer multiple losses. Regardless of my pain, I put a smile on my face and try to begin my daughter’s day on a positive note. We chat as she gets ready, some mornings we are frantic, trying to get out the door.  After I drop her off at school, I return and often find myself unable to leave the couch.

I try to enjoy and be mindful of my first cup of coffee. It always puts a smile on my face. I thank God for my husband, who almost never leaves the house without making me coffee. That’s love.

As soon as I allow myself to feel gratitude,  my heart gets lighter. I am grateful for the people I have in my life. Today is a present.

Mindfulness

You can’t stop the waves but you can learn to surf.” -Jon Kabat-Zinn

The past few weeks have been difficult for my family. It was our first Thanksgiving since my parents passed away. We decided to skip it this year, it was too difficult. Instead, we sat in our pj’s and watched movies. I took some time to think of all that I had to be thankful about, there are boundless things and people whom I am thankful for. I am mostly grateful for my parents and their gifts of discipline, faith, compassion and their love of family. We will forever cherish one another because of how they raised us.

So while I mourn my parents, I also need to honor them by being the best wife, mother, sister, friend that I can be. So I sit, I reflect, I am mindful of the pain, but I’m also mindful of all they have given me. I am grateful for their love and that will never leave me.

Jon Kabat-Zinn, a mindfulness expert, uses the ancient metaphor of the ocean to describe how mindfulness works. The entirety of our mind is deep, it’s vast and intrinsically still and quiet, like the debts in the ocean. There are times in life when the waves are dangerously rough, but if we learn to sit still and get a hold of our thoughts, we can ride through the waves.

Mindfulness is a practice, it’s all about being. Mindfulness helps you find your way, it allows you to listen to your heart, listen to your own yearning. Just begin by paying attention to your mind, really get to know it, be present, so when you are stirring the pot, or washing the dishes, just do that, be mindful of it. Whatever you are doing, do it with awareness. Dive underneath your pain, your anxiety, your anger and you will find awareness capable of holding it all and knowing “this is anxiety, It’s going to be ok”. When we actually believe our negative thoughts we spiral into anxiety and depression. Change your thought pattern and you can change your entire life. When you become aware of your negative thoughts, you have power over them. Zinn says that mindfulness is the gateway into the full dimensionality of being human of being alive. Without it you miss a lot.

I try to be mindful as much as I can. I often find it easier when I walk in nature. Mindfulness is not meditation, you don’t have to sit still for a period of time in order to be mindful. It’s just the practice of being present. Try it and you will realize that you are not your thoughts, but the awareness of your thoughts. It will change your life.

You can learn more by picking up Jon Kabat-Zinn’s book Mindfulness for Beginners.

INVICTUS

Out of the night that covers me,   
  Black as the Pit from pole to pole,   
I thank whatever gods may be   
  For my unconquerable soul.   
   
In the fell clutch of circumstance 
  I have not winced nor cried aloud.   
Under the bludgeonings of chance   
  My head is bloody, but unbowed.   
   
Beyond this place of wrath and tears   
  Looms but the Horror of the shade, 
And yet the menace of the years   
  Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.   
   
It matters not how strait the gate,   
  How charged with punishments the scroll,   
I am the master of my fate:
  I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

 

Invictus means “unconquerable” or “undefeated” in Latin, The poem was written while Henley was in the hospital being treated for Pott’s disease.

If you are fighting some sort of battle be it depression, loss, divorce, just go inward and feed your soul. Be kind to yourself, take it slow, meditate, pray, surround yourself with people who love you and want to listen to you. This may be a painful time but know that you are strong and you are never alone. And remember to count your blessings, that in itself is a way back from the dark.

Until next time……

Children and Electronics

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Recently I was talking to my cousin about the amount of time he allows his two-year old to be in front of the screen. This started a conversation about how I don’t let my 10-year old watch any television during the week. Our conversation turned into whether or not the amount of time in front of the screen makes a negative impact. This prompted me to put some research into the subject and find out what the professionals suggest. I really always went to my sister, a speech therapist and my go to guru for what I should and should not allow my daughter. I trust and respect her input and her knowledge.

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So first, here is what screen time means, watching television, being on computers, laptops, smartphones and tablets.

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I found out that too much screen time has been linked to health problems in kids including obesity and emotional problems. Experts say using media while in the classroom can be helpful, but too much use outside school decreases academic performance. Using it at bedtime has been shown to disrupt sleep. Technology can also get in the way of family time. As with anything in life balance is key.img_6336

Here is a family media use plan that is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics.

  • Mealtimes should be screen-free.
  • Homework should be done without any electronics.
  • If homework requires a computer, have kids work on it in the kitchen or other common area.
  • Don’t use electronics during the school week; this will help avoid creating a dynamic where kids rush their schoolwork to get to their screen time.
  • Have kids earn screen time by equal time spent on physical activity or chores.
  • Make bedtime screen-free.

Here are the limits of screen time for kids in different age groups according to experts:

  • Ages 0-2, no screen time
  • Ages 2-3, 30 minutes per day
  • Ages 3-5, 1 hour per day
  • Ages 5-6, 1 and a half hours per day
  • Ages 6-12 2 hours per day

So now we know that too much screen time is harmful, but it’s important to also think about what our kids are doing online. Content matters! We can use screen time to learn, create and challenge ourselves or simply to veg out. It’s important that our children’s screen time emphasizes the first three.img_6337 img_6338

Obviously technology is here to stay and we want our kids to thrive in this digital world. They can do this with our support and involvement. Start a conversation on the risks of technology use and how much screen time Is too much.

Good luck, they aren’t going to like it now but they will thank you later in life.

Oh the joys of parenting!